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Runners Are Gross

March 25, 2011

I’m celebrating Make-up Free Friday today are you??


There was coffee in this cup at one point… I swear. Coffee is a necessity for a make-up free Friday.

Well…it’s official.

I’m a real runner now.

Not because I’ve ran countless 5ks.

Not because I log 1,000s of miles a year.

Not because I can consider 6 miles a short run day.

And not because I proved I could run a grueling 26.2 miles.

But, because, it finally happened.

I didn’t ever think it’d ever happen to me, but it did.

I lost a toenail. GASP! Isn’t that gross?

I’ve come to the conclusion that runners are just gross people to the rest of the world.

Top Ten Reasons Why Runners are gross:

  1. Porta- Potties– I used to have this fear of porta-potties;  I once held it for about 8 hours while my family and I were at this carnival all day and the only choice was a porta- potty and I refused to use them. When I became a runner all that went out the door. On my first 5k I did not want to use the porta potty but I just went for it and trust me 1,000s of nervous runners didn’t make for a very pretty porta-potty. If you’re a runner you’ll get over this fear real quick.
  2. Chafing– Fortunately (knock on wood) I don’t have to deal with this too bad. Runners are known to chafe everywhere! Shorts line, socks lines, shirt line, sports bra line, anywhere anything rubs will likely chafe. Some runners rub themselves down with Vaseline before a race (ew) and some men even chafe so bad their nipples bleed (um double ew!).
  3. Blisters– I had a pair of shoes that once gave me a blister on every.single.toe. gross.
  4. Potty Mouths– We runners know we have problems and we’re not afraid to talk about it. Get with a group of runners and you’ll likely hear them discussing snot, and bathroom issues casually over breakfast.
  5. We Stink– Well we sweat. A LOT. And then we go eat, go shop at the grocery store, and run errands in our stinky get-ups.  Sometimes runners even re-wear a shirt or pair of running shorts if they didn’t sweat “that bad” in it the first time (guilty). That makes for some stinky clothes and stinky runners.
  6. Snot Rockets– This is totally not my thing but I’ve seen my fair share of snot rockets going on during races and training runs. Peak running season for Texas are during winter months. Running in cold weather = Super runny noses= snot rockets. I find IPods are great for muffling the sound of a snot rocket. Just steer clear if the runner is in front of you!
  7. Black Toenails– I got my first black toenail during marathon training. That was a mortifying pedicure L A black toenail is caused by a toenail that’s been “injured” rubbing up against a shoe
  8. No Toenails– I just learned that a black toenail will eventually lead to no toenail. I think I’d prefer the former; at least I could cover it up with polish.
  9. They’ll “go” anywhere– Run a half or full marathon and you’ll see runners breaking off into the woods through each mile (mostly guys- not fair!). Runners do this on training runs too. Hey if you gotta go you gotta go.
  10. Runners Trots– Enough said. Google it.

I try not to be a gross runner, but sometimes I get a little stinky and apparently I lose toenails. At least I’m in the majority.

Hope you guys are having a great Friday. Mines involving grocery shopping, chatting on the phone with my mom, snacking around for dinner, and maybe some DVR- I’m wild, I know…I’ve got some major miles to log on my bike tomorrow morning and I can’t wait!

Do you ever just snack around for dinner? Are you a gross runner? Have you experienced some gross runners?

7 Comments leave one →
  1. shiningfromwithin permalink
    March 25, 2011 8:08 PM

    OWWW! I refuse to use the port-a-pottys too & snot rockets are NAAASTY! I’ve never done one of those. I think I’m too “dainty” to be a gross runner! I don’t go hardcore all out like other runners with snot rockets and running into the woods lol, but like you said, gotta do wha ya gotta do! PS – those are super cute sandles!

  2. March 26, 2011 12:05 PM

    a love snacky dinners 🙂 and no im not a runner but i love learning about runners from this post! haha

  3. March 26, 2011 12:42 PM

    I used to be a competitive dancer, and after a grueling pointe workshop that lasted about 6 hours, I discovered I had lost 4 toenails. It was horrendous.

  4. March 26, 2011 4:02 PM

    It is too hot in south Tejas to eat big meals in summer. We do fruit and veggie plates almost every night. I add cheese and lots of black beans for fiber and protien.
    as for snott rockets…im too embarrassed to do it but that does not keep me from wetting my sleeve with those gross things in winter. I started carying tissue…

  5. Lettuce Choose Healthy permalink
    March 26, 2011 4:16 PM

    I lost the same toenail! haha it makes you look hardcore!

    I just nominated you on my blog for the style award 🙂

  6. Samm I Amm permalink
    March 27, 2011 10:45 AM

    I’m still traumatized from our runners trots conversation at your bachelorette party…yikes.

    Hummus sounds excellent for dinner, I opted for Nutella, pretzels and a Ginger ale!

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